I began my religious and priestly training in the seminary with the feeling that I was going to fail. I struggled to overcome this lingering doubt that I could persevere through formation to the end. It was only after some spiritual direction that I discovered how the many areas of condemnation that I had were slowly taking away my hope and strength for the vocation.
I had internalized condemnations from others and from myself that made me doubt my ability to become a Catholic priest. I found the freedom and joy to persevere in my religious and priestly vocation only after I slowly began to name and renounce these condemnations.
We all have a choice to make in this life when it comes to facing our condemnations. We can either believe and hold on to them, letting them destroy our peace and hinder us from fulfilling the will of God. Or we can allow His merciful love to drive them away from our hearts and give us peace and a sense of purpose.
This is the choice before the woman caught in adultery in John 8:1-11. She was obviously guilty of the adulterous acts she was being accused of by the scribes and Pharisees. But she also had the choice regarding what would fill her heart—condemnation from herself and the Jewish leaders or the merciful love that Jesus offered to her.
We see the many facets of condemnation in the behavior of the scribes and Pharisees towards this woman. They did not offer her any possibility of forgiveness. They shamed her publicly by bringing her and “making her stand in the middle” for all to see. They condemned her not because they wanted to be faithful to the laws of Moses as they claimed. But they used her sin as a ruse to trap Jesus. They denied her any second chance to begin again. Lastly, they did not offer her any help at all in being faithful to God’s commandments.
On His part, Jesus saw every single detail of all her sins as well as their gravity. He saw her sins and those of her accusers—much more than they could even imagine. “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” But He who sees sins clearly and who is offended most by our sins did not offer any form of condemnation because that is not why He came into this world in the first place: “God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world but that the world may be saved through Him” (Jn. 3:17).
On the contrary, Jesus offered her merciful love in these words, “Neither do I condemn you. Go, and from now on do not sin anymore.” He did not condemn her but offered her forgiveness for all her sins even before she made any act of contrition. In telling her to “Go,” He was offering her another chance, a new beginning in life, and asking her to leave that place of condemnation and public shame. He saw that she had goodness in her and that she could still become a saint. In telling her not to sin anymore, Jesus, who always “has the word of everlasting life” (Jn. 6:68), gave her the grace to actually begin to resist sin and live a holy life.
Interestingly, St. John does not tell us how the woman responded to the words of Jesus or the condemnations of the Jewish leaders. We don’t know if she allowed the love of God or the voice of condemnation to fill her heart. I believe that we sinners are meant to enter into this story contemplatively and make our own choice between the mercy of God and the many voices of condemnation. Let us enter into this passage in prayer and examine what is in our hearts.
As Christians, we face condemnations all the time from the devil, the world, and our fallen natures. The devil accuses and condemns us for our sins and failings. Even when we resist his diabolical temptations, he will do anything to lie and condemn us.
The world cannot wait to publicize and make known to all people our own failures too. As fallen people, it is so easy to forget or ignore the good deeds of others while magnifying and focusing on their little failures. The world is very quick to condemn and label us for our perceived failures.
We also condemn ourselves for our own shortcomings. We easily doubt or question any good in us or any good intentions that we have. We even begin to feel that we are not good enough to follow Jesus and become His saints in our fallen world. The promise of eternal life seems impossible to many of us. Many doubt that their sins have been forgiven by God.
St. Paul is a soul filled with the love of God and not condemnation. He shows us in Philippians 3:8-14 how to allow the love of God to dispel our condemnations.
Seek to know Jesus as our sovereign Lord. “I consider everything as a loss because of the supreme good of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.” Jesus Christ saves us from sin and conquers all condemnations when we know Him and love Him as we should. He makes us see ourselves not as condemned sinners, but as beloved children of God, “To all who received Him, who believe in His name, He gave power to become children of God” (Jn. 1:12). We fear no condemnation when we are in Him, “For now there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Rom. 8:1).
Seek for the holiness that Christ alone offers. “Not having any righteousness of my own based on the law but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God, depending on faith.” We succumb to condemnation so easily when we are seeking to be holy apart from Jesus Christ. We easily condemn ourselves when all our trust is in our personal efforts and our egotistical and self-centered ideas of holiness. We break the hold of condemnation when we are firmly rooted in Christ and His holiness in us; “Christ in you, the hope of glory” (Col. 1:27).
Refuse to live in the past. “Just one thing: forgetting what lies behind but straining forward to what lies ahead.” St. Paul is not a slave of whatever may have happened in the past whether he was successful or not in his life and ministry. He does not linger in his acceptance or rejection by others. He shows us that we do not have to wallow in self-pity and regrets about past things or experiences. We cannot overcome our condemnations when we are fixated on past failures and negative experiences.
Share in the suffering of Christ, “depending on faith to know Him, and the power of His resurrection and the sharing of His sufferings by being conformed to His death.” St. Paul finds strength in sharing in the suffering of Christ and His resurrection. We lose our strength for the spiritual life when we believe and interiorize condemnations. However, we share in the resurrection power when we freely share in the suffering of Christ who was condemned on the cross for our salvation.
Persevere to the very end. “I continue my pursuit toward the goal, the prize of God’s upward calling in Christ Jesus.” He presses on into the future with Christ because he knows that he has “been taken possession of by Christ Jesus.” He does not give up in his journey of faith. We too must persevere in our journey to full communion with God in heaven instead of giving in to the condemnations that cripple us and keep us slaves to the past.
My dear brothers and sisters in Christ, Jesus offers us His merciful love in the sacrament of Reconciliation. This is where we stand before Him and allow Him to forgive us all our sins, give us a new beginning with hope, and offer us the graces that we need for holy living and victory over sin. This sacrament is thus the divine remedy for all forms of condemnation that we face.
Amidst all our condemnations in this world, let us choose to make use of this sacrament more frequently and come to know the merciful heart of Jesus. This is how our hearts can be filled with God’s merciful love, not condemnations.
Glory to Jesus!!! Honor to Mary!!!
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